What’s the weirdest phone call you have ever received?

No sir I sure don't, I live in the next city over.

Do you reside at 1234 X X Lane?

Is your number (xxx) xxx-xxxx??

Are you worried that the 2024 US presidential election will result in a close race?

Do what? Officer, I'm sorry I have no kids of my own, and I don't know anybody by that name.

Sure no problem officer.

Hi this is Sargent Moss from the County detention center. Is this Sean?

Should women be allowed in “combat roles” within the military?

I hear a pause on the line, it goes quiet for a few seconds.

HELLO

Long pause, OK. (Inaudible talking). Could you hang on for just a sec?

How can one select funeral songs that truly celebrate the essence of a loved one’s life while providing comfort to attendees?

{RING} {RING}

Looks at phone, sees a number local to me, so I answered.

I was trying to reach out to you because we have a Mr X here, who claims you are his legal guardian. He needs you to come down and sign some forms.

Why are men obsessed with breasts and their size? I don't quite see women being obsessed with the penis - Why is this so?

Yes sir it is.

After a few moments he returns.

I'm sorry to bother you, my staff just told me our guy corrected his information and had a number off for his home phone. Have a good day. Hangs up.

Why is it difficult to get a job?

Whew, not in trouble!! But someone named Sean with a similar number is apparently about to have a rather bad day.

ATTENTION SPIKES UP. What could he want with me? Did I do something wrong? Lord did I forget to pay something? Questions start flying through my head. What would the detention center sheriff want with me?